It Fits!

Got this as a gift. I was pretty sure the top would fit, but not the bottoms. But it all fits! OMG! I haven’t fit it in this size since I was in college. Wow!

Body vs Weight

I continue to struggle with slow weight loss. If you look at the timeline, you can see that it’s going down, but just creeping down. I lose a pound, go up and down for 3 weeks, lose another, etc. I posted I was down 50 lbs total, but that was about 2 weeks ago and NOTHING since. I am following the plan. I have certain “macros” to follow:

  • Protein between 75 and 90 grams
  • Water at least 80 oz
  • Net carbs under 50

I don’t have a specific calorie target, but generally get between 900 and 1100.

I also follow all of the other guidance about not drinking while eating, and getting exercise. But nothing seems to change.

On the other hand… I’ve gone from a 4XL shirt down to a snug XL. That’s huge! I can wear some tops from a regular store! Unbelievable! I am thinner in many places: face, arms, legs, butt, chest.

On the other hand… I’m still carrying a huge amount of weight in my belly. I’ve gone from a size 26/28 to a 20/22. That’s 2 sizes, which is great, but actually I hit that many months ago, and since then, nothing.

Frustrated!!

Another NSV: Opthalmologist

You know when you go to the Opthalmologist and you have to scoot forward and put your chin and forehead on various machines so they can look in your eyes and take pictures and such? My belly used to get in the way and it was really stressful and uncomfortable. No issues today! 😁😁

Weird Body Shape

I’m definitely losing weight, but where I’m losing weight is strange.

Before this journey I had relatively thin legs, a little butt, wide feet, and small-ish breasts. The first place I noticed a reduced size was in my feet. Weird! (see my post from June 18) Then my breasts, butt, and legs! The places I didn’t need to lose! I went from a B cup bra to a saggy A.

Then I noticed I was smaller in my shoulders. Instead of my arms angling out in an upside-down V, then were more straight up and down because of the lack of body fat on my sides. I measured the other day and my bra band size has gone from 54 to 46. Do you know how hard it is to find bras in a 46A? I think it’s even harder than a 54B, which I used to wear.

I have always had a big belly. Here I am, over 80 lbs lighter, and I *still* have a big belly! Annoying! I’m down about 2 sizes in pants, but my belly is still my most pronounced feature. Frustrating! A bunch of it is loose skin; I will definitely be having plastic surgery, hopefully as soon as next year.

Finally, another really frustrating area for me is the mons area, the area covering the pubic bone. Mins has always been very full. Now it’s like a deflated ballon. Definitely on the list for plastic surgery!

Thrift Store Clothes

I’m a big fan of “reuse” in clothes; I love to shop at thrift stores. But because of my size I haven’t been able to find anything that fit me for many years.

Dani went to a thrift store today and came back with two shirts and two pairs of shorts for me. The shorts are size 36 and 40 (men’s), and I’m still pretty big around the waist, so it will be a while before they fit. The two shirts are a little snug, but are close to being my size. They are a size XL! I haven’t worn an XL since… I can’t remember when! I have been a 4XL for many years. I remember being a 3XL maybe 20 years ago, but don’t have a solid memory of anything smaller than that for probably 30 years.

Weird, but kinda cool

Party Clothes

Went to an event at the SF Eagle with the leather community, but had angst because most of my cute clothes are too big. Not a bad problem to have, but still difficult. Came up with a very cute outfit that showed off my new physique.

3 appointments, 3 days of walking

Turns out I had 4 separate doctor’s appointments this week, on Monday (2), Tuesday, and Wednesday. I had a great victory: I walked from my car to the appointments and back again. And on one of the trips I took the stairs down from the 3rd floor.

My back hurt progressively more each day, but it’s not hurting to the point where I feel like I need to take Tylenol. Almost, but not quite. The hard part is knowing if this walking is irritating my back more, or if walking will actually help re-develop my walking muscles. I guess I’ll keep walking, and see what happens.

Meanwhile, the scale stays stuck; no movement in 3 weeks. Sigh.

Walking and Weight and Hunger

Walked again today. Just up to the stop sign and back. A couple of hundred yards. I put on my sneakers for the first time since I wore them to the gym in February of 2020. (I’ve been wearing my walking sandals during the pandemic, but they finally bit the dust a few weeks ago.)

It feels really weird. My back hurts some, but mostly my hips are complaining. They’re not used to walking. I’m really working on my gait, keeping my feet aligned and my arms moving and not rocking back and forth. I didn’t walk far, but I walked, and it felt great.

On the other hand, my weight hasn’t budged in a while. As usual. It’s really hard to stay motivated. I generally eat between 900 and 1000 calories. Some people think this is too little, so I upped it to 1100-1300 for a few days. Back down around 1000 now. I’m getting in my daily vitamins, water (80-90 oz), protein (75-90gm). Even with some walking, my chair aerobics, and yoga. Stuck. Grrr.

And if that wasn’t bad enough, I’m hungry a lot more all of a sudden. Maybe my body is saying yes, please eat! Or maybe it’s self-sabotage. I get people advising me to eat more, or just ignore it, or drink more. Nobody really knows what to do, and nothing seems to help.

Can you tell I’m on a bit of a downer?